I’m too disturbed.
I’m disturbed by tv news, talkings, words, financial weakness, joblessness, ..nowadays bhakts are too disturbing on whatsapp as well.
I’m not happy – I’m not at peace these days. I feel this is not what I’m for.
I know, I cannot change circumstances around me, I cannot change the society, but at least I could be detached from those causes that disturb my peace.
I have to be quiet. I must be observer. I should not be intruder among social debates on whatsapp. I have left posting on Facebook. Arguments disturb inner peace.
Let people die.
I cannot save them. And saving them is not my responsibility. Nobody can save them. They, who pretend to be messiah politically, socially, religiously, are fake! They are successful people who succeeded to fool the public. I’m not bodhisattva. I’m not Buddha. I’m not always right.
I wish to be at myself.
Far from these people – human society, religion, political ideologies. This society is divided into many organised groups based on faiths, ideologies, self benefits for group. I’m social – butthis society is not for me, I’m not for this society.
..I wish, I could go somewhere away from these people. I feel, too much noise here. Tv channels, talking people, Facebook, whatsapp, ..
I don’t miss my parents.
I don’t miss anyone. I don’t miss my relatives. I’m not insensitive – I have emotions – but I’m not to miss anyone or cry for them. I need first to be with myself – for what I try. And I get disturbed by outside causes. I lose inner peace.
It’s good – I have sense to see inside myself. I can see I’m happy or sad or angry or what feelings I have. I can see how my feelings get changed into other feeling.
23:52 Sunday 13 November 2016