Mysterious Inner

What one knows and what all informations one has, proves useless when the time comes. One acts and behaves according to his instinct, that is inner personality one gets developed through his environment, society, family, incidents happened with him, conclusions, teachings, opinions, ..somewhat impressions of memories by previous experiences.
Few days ago I was sitting in infinity, reading ‘The Secret Of The Golden Flower,’ a girl with mic approached to me, one cameraman and another girl also was with her, she was asking some people if they know about GST. When she asked the person beside me, he could not answer her with little embarrassment. She came near to me and asked ‘excuse me, do you know about GST?’ I was reading the book and her question was a disturbing for me, I said ‘I am reading something and I am not willing to talk this time.’ She left.
At least I could have replied the full form of GST, or would have replied something funny but happened what? I left her with an arrogant image of mine in her mind and their camera.
Few days ago the person disturbed my secret meditation, also a realisation that I am not open to people and I use arrogance, egoist mask to prevent myself from society.

— The inner is like that.
They believe, instinct too can be created.

I am not sure.

A young boy around his 17, student of 11 or 12 class, had completed Shramner Shivir already, killed two kids and their mother. It was ‘triple murder case’ of Sarekha-Kosmi in 2008 or 2010. The murderer boy then informed to police and after one week he shifted in another house in front of my home in Kosmi. His inner made him to kill his landlord lady and her two kids. He was cleverer than professional murderers and I don’t think he learned it from professionals.
The inner is Mysterious One. All emotions and thoughts come from it and it’s only makes one react on outside world. How it works, how it makes equations with outer world, is a mystery for me. I feel a kind of irritation to see reports provoking extreme nationalism or spreading hate against neighbouring nations on TV news channels.
It’s not so simple. Or it maybe that simple, I cannot understand. 
20:16 Wednesday 5th July 2017

My Teacher!


“When three people walk together, my Teacher is among them.” One who has three treasures can know the meaning of it. This is just an example of knowing hidden secrets lying in simple words.
Recently I have finished ‘The Secret Of The Golden Flower’ and it was not knowing anything new. All I was reading was just verification of what I knew already. I understand 100 days, Yellow Lady, Flower, Sitting, The Pill, ..but one thing is there – I just have the guessing not true experience of that book. I have experiences of my meditation practices not of described in that book.
Today, after few months, when I saw this quote of Confucius, a kind of happiness suddenly emerged in me and I was smiling. Same happiness I had when I was reading ‘The Secret Of The Golden Flower.’ It was the happiness of Knowing – that ‘I knew’ – It is not proud or ego on myself that – ‘I knew.’ 
I am thankful to my friends who helped to got me three treasures. I respect the Master, but I am more thankful to friends. I know the ‘Buddha sitting on the Lotus.’
*
21:03 Tuesday 4th July 2017

Singing Is Good

Happiness makes you sing, and same with sadness too, even when you are angry, you can sing sometimes but depressed person does not sing. Singing is miraculous – it nourishes hope.
When I started theatre in 1999-2000, we used to sing JanaGeet in Samvet. We had only small book of JanaGeet and most of us had mugged up all songs. With or sometimes without dholak it was the best time of my school days. Samvet was dismantled soon and all seniors joined to Natya Kala Parishad, I was the only artist who joined Nutan Kala Niketan of that team. There, in Niketan, trend was different. They used to sing Folk songs and I found me not interested in that. I was from group with Communist ideology and here folk songs seemed to me of backward people. It took me a long time to realize that I was wrong.
I am not good at singing. Sometimes in Fotang, when I am asked to sing, I do, and them I feel a combination of embarrassment and happiness, both.
05:15 am Saturday 1st July 2017

No Empty Hands!

​Dhamma is always with me.
It was with me before I came here. It was with me when I was born. It is still with me and it will be with me even when I am leaving.
They say –

‘You came here empty hands and you will go with empty hands’

Is true for them who see the Results.

The True and more important is

the Cause, the Source of Results.
They, who know the Way, know,

Dhamma is always there.
I was in Dhamma before I came here. I was in Dhamma when I was born. I remain in Dhamma and Dhamma will be there with me even when I am leaving to Dhamma.
I Know The Way 🙂
04:31 am Saturday 1st July 2017

Responsive People

1. People are always about to response.

They here to reply. They are filled with emotions and thoughts.
2. Maun is one who is empty inside.

When he is supposed to reply, he says what imprints first in mind after listening words. His answer is pure, without filters of self emotions and calculation of mind, but with intelligence.
3. One who is quiet but filled with responses is full of garbage.
4. One who speaks out without considering the results would be, is pure but not appreciable.
5. The DCS from Singapore told me in Dhamma Class, when I asked her ‘should I speak honestly?’ about my feelings for Dhamma Class, because some people would may hurt with my words. She said ‘speak honestly what you feel but mind your way of saying.’

Sometimes, way of expression matters not words or facts.
6. In a crowded place one finds himself is reflection of outside world. When inner is not contaminated by outside world and its informations, one may find himself with awareness.
7. When thoughts and emotions are disappeared, but knowing is rest, is the state beyond of all (not just two) ends/edges.

Everyone of us reach there but rare are who stay.
10:10 am Monday 26th June 2017

तालाब किनारे की झोपड़ी

एक छोटा सा तालाब है ।

यह छोटी सी एक झील भी हो सकता है ।

आसपास कुछ पेड़ हैं मगर घने जंगल नहीं ।

घास है ।

तालाब का पानी साफ है और शाम को लोगों के पालतू जानवर यहां नहाने भी आते हैं ।

पक्षी सुबह शाम स्वाभाविक रूप से उड़ते हैं ।

तालाब से लगा एक छोटा सा घर है – झोपड़ी जैसा

पारंपरिक छोटा घर ।

घर कंक्रीट से बना है

अंदर जीवित रहने लायक सभी सुविधाएँ हैं लेकिन 

विलासिता की कोई वस्तु नहीं है ।

झोपड़ी के बाहर जैसी जितनी शांति है वैसी ही अंदर भी है ।

इस तालाब को झील कहें तो ज्यादा अच्छा है ।

इस झील और झोपड़ी के लगभग एक किलोमीटर दूर कुछ पहाड़ियां हैं पूरब में ।

दो तीन पहाड़ियां पश्चिम में भी हैं ।

दोनो तरफ पहाड़ों पर घने पेड़ हैं ।

सूरज हर सुबह इन्हीं पहाड़ों के पीछे से उगता और शाम को इन्हीं के पीछे छुपता है ।

इसमें कोई खेल नहीं है ।

झोपड़ी के अंदर बारिश का पानी नहीं रिसता ।

गरमी ज्यादा नहीं लगती और ठंडी बड़ी मजेदार होती है ।

यह झील एक छोटे से कस्बे की बाहरी सीमा पर है ।

शहर तो है ही नहीं दूर दूर तक ।

यहां इस कस्बे में और आसपास कोई बीमार नहीं होता, जाति – धर्म – राजनीति से अछूता कस्बा है ।

झोपड़ी के अंदर जो रहता है वो हजारों साल से

रह रहा है ।

तो भी कस्बे में डाॅक्टर, हाॅस्पीटल, स्कूल भी है ।
13:59 Sunday 25th June 2017

Photo : Google

Write For Self

Copy-Paste is not satisfactory.

It’s on Whatsapp and Facebook that people do much copy-paste, forwarding and sharing someone’s post in other groups or their walls.
Copy-paste, forwarding and sharing are not good for one who wants to empty himself. Here it’s my space, here I write for myself. I am here far from the population which are busy following, commenting, criticizing and fighting with each others on social sites. I wonder why people take Twitter posts so seriously and the foolish is – newspapers make news on Twitter posts.
Writing is a tool for them who want to read their mind. It helps to know what and how is in one’s mind – condition is – to write honestly. When writing is not to impress anything anyone or criticize or praising others, its for self. To examine yourself. To see how one’s thoughts has been being changed. How emotions works inside.
One who writes for himself, is actually emptying himself. It’s dumping your thoughts and emotions outside somewhere. If it’s on Facebook, it creates dissatisfaction and unhappiness inside. It may disturb relationship also.
13:25 Sunday 25th June 2017