Mysterious Inner

What one knows and what all informations one has, proves useless when the time comes. One acts and behaves according to his instinct, that is inner personality one gets developed through his environment, society, family, incidents happened with him, conclusions, teachings, opinions, ..somewhat impressions of memories by previous experiences.
Few days ago I was sitting in infinity, reading ‘The Secret Of The Golden Flower,’ a girl with mic approached to me, one cameraman and another girl also was with her, she was asking some people if they know about GST. When she asked the person beside me, he could not answer her with little embarrassment. She came near to me and asked ‘excuse me, do you know about GST?’ I was reading the book and her question was a disturbing for me, I said ‘I am reading something and I am not willing to talk this time.’ She left.
At least I could have replied the full form of GST, or would have replied something funny but happened what? I left her with an arrogant image of mine in her mind and their camera.
Few days ago the person disturbed my secret meditation, also a realisation that I am not open to people and I use arrogance, egoist mask to prevent myself from society.

— The inner is like that.
They believe, instinct too can be created.

I am not sure.

A young boy around his 17, student of 11 or 12 class, had completed Shramner Shivir already, killed two kids and their mother. It was ‘triple murder case’ of Sarekha-Kosmi in 2008 or 2010. The murderer boy then informed to police and after one week he shifted in another house in front of my home in Kosmi. His inner made him to kill his landlord lady and her two kids. He was cleverer than professional murderers and I don’t think he learned it from professionals.
The inner is Mysterious One. All emotions and thoughts come from it and it’s only makes one react on outside world. How it works, how it makes equations with outer world, is a mystery for me. I feel a kind of irritation to see reports provoking extreme nationalism or spreading hate against neighbouring nations on TV news channels.
It’s not so simple. Or it maybe that simple, I cannot understand. 
20:16 Wednesday 5th July 2017

Singing Is Good

Happiness makes you sing, and same with sadness too, even when you are angry, you can sing sometimes but depressed person does not sing. Singing is miraculous – it nourishes hope.
When I started theatre in 1999-2000, we used to sing JanaGeet in Samvet. We had only small book of JanaGeet and most of us had mugged up all songs. With or sometimes without dholak it was the best time of my school days. Samvet was dismantled soon and all seniors joined to Natya Kala Parishad, I was the only artist who joined Nutan Kala Niketan of that team. There, in Niketan, trend was different. They used to sing Folk songs and I found me not interested in that. I was from group with Communist ideology and here folk songs seemed to me of backward people. It took me a long time to realize that I was wrong.
I am not good at singing. Sometimes in Fotang, when I am asked to sing, I do, and them I feel a combination of embarrassment and happiness, both.
05:15 am Saturday 1st July 2017

No Empty Hands!

​Dhamma is always with me.
It was with me before I came here. It was with me when I was born. It is still with me and it will be with me even when I am leaving.
They say –

‘You came here empty hands and you will go with empty hands’

Is true for them who see the Results.

The True and more important is

the Cause, the Source of Results.
They, who know the Way, know,

Dhamma is always there.
I was in Dhamma before I came here. I was in Dhamma when I was born. I remain in Dhamma and Dhamma will be there with me even when I am leaving to Dhamma.
I Know The Way 🙂
04:31 am Saturday 1st July 2017

तालाब किनारे की झोपड़ी

एक छोटा सा तालाब है ।

यह छोटी सी एक झील भी हो सकता है ।

आसपास कुछ पेड़ हैं मगर घने जंगल नहीं ।

घास है ।

तालाब का पानी साफ है और शाम को लोगों के पालतू जानवर यहां नहाने भी आते हैं ।

पक्षी सुबह शाम स्वाभाविक रूप से उड़ते हैं ।

तालाब से लगा एक छोटा सा घर है – झोपड़ी जैसा

पारंपरिक छोटा घर ।

घर कंक्रीट से बना है

अंदर जीवित रहने लायक सभी सुविधाएँ हैं लेकिन 

विलासिता की कोई वस्तु नहीं है ।

झोपड़ी के बाहर जैसी जितनी शांति है वैसी ही अंदर भी है ।

इस तालाब को झील कहें तो ज्यादा अच्छा है ।

इस झील और झोपड़ी के लगभग एक किलोमीटर दूर कुछ पहाड़ियां हैं पूरब में ।

दो तीन पहाड़ियां पश्चिम में भी हैं ।

दोनो तरफ पहाड़ों पर घने पेड़ हैं ।

सूरज हर सुबह इन्हीं पहाड़ों के पीछे से उगता और शाम को इन्हीं के पीछे छुपता है ।

इसमें कोई खेल नहीं है ।

झोपड़ी के अंदर बारिश का पानी नहीं रिसता ।

गरमी ज्यादा नहीं लगती और ठंडी बड़ी मजेदार होती है ।

यह झील एक छोटे से कस्बे की बाहरी सीमा पर है ।

शहर तो है ही नहीं दूर दूर तक ।

यहां इस कस्बे में और आसपास कोई बीमार नहीं होता, जाति – धर्म – राजनीति से अछूता कस्बा है ।

झोपड़ी के अंदर जो रहता है वो हजारों साल से

रह रहा है ।

तो भी कस्बे में डाॅक्टर, हाॅस्पीटल, स्कूल भी है ।
13:59 Sunday 25th June 2017

Photo : Google

Mysterious Is Hidden and Uncovered too!

There are three universes, they say –


Outside but under the Sky

Unseen/which is still hidden/Secret
Person, knows something about him but not all. Here individual’s universe which is hidden is mysterious.
Outside world- under the Sky, inside oceans, hidden in earth and far beyond the limits in universe – something we know but not all.

Here, the unknown is hidden and mysterious.
Something which one feels but generally not notices and ignores. If notices but not careful about the experience. If carefully experiences, but cannot explain – is hidden and mysterious.
The hidden is mysterious because one cannot reach to it. For one, who reaches there, everything is opened and clear, brighten and shining.
02:14 a.m. Monday 19th June 2017

Balance, To Make Even

When you touch metals, you feel, your getting lighter, energy flows towards the body part in contact with metallic stuff.

If it’s wooden stuff, feeling is neutral.

If it’s woollen, or cotton, feeling is same as with wood.
Sensitivity depends on sincerity.

One can feel the touch, but not the flow.

Anything which comes in contact with other, does exchange something – either it’s energy or temperature, or something, – to keep balance.
Nature promotes balance.

Equality is final goal of all movements.

So the wind moves and we see in its extreme as typhoons. In ocean, there are so many rivers, we call them streams, wandering here to there, finding their appropriate place.
Balance, fulfilment, to make equal, is Tao!

To help in it, to support it, is being on the way.

The Way Is Great!
01:47 a.m. Monday 19th June 2017

They Will Remain UnHappy!

If one is unhappy and depressed with his life, then he searches for internal, individual, personal happiness. This happiness can be so called spiritual mental peace otherwise in most of cases, the person is centralized with himself, his family, wife, children. His personal problems like illness, joblessness, are enough to make him worried and unhappy, disturbed. He has no higher goals in his life. He spends life to fulfil formalities for survival. All his efforts are either for himself or his family or relatives. Rest of world, he thinks, is cruel, unsafe, dangerous place with enemies.
I see people, who misbehave with others wearing cheap clothes, they hate poor looking people, they talk not respectful with countryside people. They, who are literate, English speaking, rich people, are uncivilized and uneducated. 
I see people around me – tall, with string muscles, but they are slaves. They are dizzying, sad, bored, looking for excitement in outer entertainment. They smell bad and to hide it they sprinkle sprays, deodorants, perfumes on their body and clothes. I do not hate them. I wonder to see how they live with superficial emotional expressions. They seem satisfied with their lifestyle. They have learned how to live like that. Their strongest desire is to be living. If they are living, they satisfy their ego, physical desires, tongue, and they just want anyhow not to die. It never been so difficult for me to tolerate such people and conditions of society. Now I’m fed up of all these. Everything has become irritating for me. I’m more sensitive for all these. I was taught to be the same person everyone are but now I’m changed. I’m unfit to this society and likeminded people are few.
23:41 Wednesday 24th May 2017