First Paying Student

I’m only in Green Park that has been continuing with Chinese friends so it was easy for others to notice me. I don’t know what people think about me or about my friends from China. Some people said me they like my Tai Chi movements. A person, more than 50 years, has  sometimes asked me to teach him Tai Chi but I took his words not seriously. When he suggested me to start a class and he would like to be my first paying-student, I agreed happily.
Next day, at decided time I reached at the park and he was six minutes late.

I asked him if he wants to learn without pay or would like to pay my fees?

I said 500/- rupees for 45 minutes session, per day, and he would learn 24 within 5-7 days, and rest 20 days will be for practicing.

Maybe, he misunderstood my words and thought I would charge 500/- per day for entire the month while my fees would be for 7 days only. Rest 20 days practice would be free. Initial 7 days I would ask him to be continue and and sincere.

He said he would give me 5000/- for entire the month.

I said – OK.


Happened what, 

We started the class. And after some movements he found Tai Chi is too difficult for him. He thought me doing Tai Chi movements are smooth and easy but he realized too difficult and said – ‘Shekhar, I think I need to study it more then I should come to you again.’

I said – OK

I suggested him to watch videos also.

And this is how I lost my first paying student. My commercial class has been stopped before starting.
I think, I’m not good for teaching. Some people say me a good teacher but this example and experience was not good for me as Tai Chi teacher.
Another lady wanted to learn and after some classes she left. She also said me that she would give some fees but she never came back.
I feel, they like to see me doing Tai Chi, they feel it is easy and relaxing exercise, for body and mind but it is difficult when it comes to do for them.

..or I’m not good person to teach these people.
I don’t have any other options. Teaching Tai Chi would be another option. I’m hesitant to ask people for fees. This time I asked openly and student left.
18:45 Wednesday 7th June 2017

Helpful Tai Chi 

Rudeness in talking comes,

if one is disturbed, 

Unsatisfied inside.
It’s important to know

If you are rude or your way of talking is rude.

Maybe you have not achieved that what you have been expecting to.

Your dissatisfaction with what you have earned in your life

Also makes you doing what you do, how you do.

Karma, or all other factors are also there.

Family, friends, surrounding or loneliness makes one careless about society.

Carefreeness is actually frustration towards people and society.
Then politeness come like helplessness.

You are not dominating because you don’t dare to order people.

You are no authoritative.
In that case,

You are



Almost Dead!!!
Tai Chi helps to deal with all this.

Tai Chi helps to know the formless, nameless, thoughtless, emotionless.

The light is there with 

No emotions, 

No thoughts,

No names,

No forms.

You find yourself with everything.

All material things are there with their real look.

All forms are results of that formlessness.

And suddenly you are caged again in projected reality –

And you find that you are not free yet!
21:15 Thursday 5th May 2017

After One Year Of Tai Chi 

Wo – You want me to fry fish on my palm in one year of practice of Tai Chi?
Ta – Is that possible?
Wo – I don’t know. Someone said it’s possible. Someone did it, they say.
Ta – How long it will take to have such power in your hands?
Wo – I don’t know. I even don’t know it’s possible.
Ta – You said it’s possible.
Wo – Someone said, I didn’t.
Ta – What is benefit of learning Tai Chi then?
Wo – Learning Tai Chi itself is a benefit. It’s an achievement itself. I don’t do Tai Chi for getting benefits.
Ta – It’s foolish to practice Tai Chi if it has no benefits. You are stupid.
Wo – For it’s health, physical and mental benefits, do Google yourself. And don’t get be greedy about it’s miraculous supernatural achievements.
Ta – What kind of supernatural achievements?
Wo – All depends on practices.
Ta – When will have those powers? Can you beat someone from four feet distance?
Wo – Answer for first question – I don’t know.

Answer for second question – No.
21:16 Friday 31st March 2017

Being Master Is An Image! 

​I want to share about two topics :-

1. I’m not master of anything.

2. Does imagination change the reality?
‘Jack of all, Master of none’ is one of oldest saying I read while learning English. As an IAS aspirant we used to said for doing study to know about everything not for specialization. I was not good in study, I didn’t study well. Now,  when I see myself, I have nothing. I have no specialty. Maybe my Tai Chi movements are good, they may look good, but I’m not master. I’m not trained actor. I didn’t learn Kathak passionately. All my practices of meditations are left incomplete. What I successfully completed? ‘The Alchemist’, some other books and plays, I used to read ‘Sachchhi Veerata’ many times when I was in 12th class. These didn’t make me master of anything – I have nothing which may help me to earn money. Bhaskar Bhaiya suggested me to learn Yoga and become Yoga Teacher. That would be another good option for earning money for survival. What I teach in Tai Chi – just movements, forms, ..I can’t teach application of those movements in fighting.
Second, if an advocate creates a story and makes judge to give results in his side – means the advocate is able to bring his imagination into reality. Religious gurus say ‘there is a god’ someone imaginary which they believe exists. Gurus make people to believe what gurus have in their minds. If gurus are aware of their falsehood, that’s different matter. If a priest believes that a goddess is responsible for a village, he believes that for safety of the village, people must worship the goddess – is an imagination of the priest which he has brought into real world, and if other people also start believing the same about both goddess and village, the priest is successful. 
A boy was considered coward, hesitant, ..all kids used to make fun of him. Once he said every to call him ‘bhai’, suddenly his behaviour also changed, and kids stopped making fun of him. I believe – food, clothing and house is not in my priorities. And I’m not obliged to follow what others have image about me.

29th December 2016, Thursday 

​I cannot understand this world. I cannot understand people. Most of times I’m failed to understand everything outside of me. Even inside of me, many happenings are not revealed to me. What I know is my limitation, and what I can understand is my capability, what I can do is my area. I’m nothing but a small particle, of this universe.


I’m not feeling to teach Tai Chi. I know what? Just 24, 48 & 32 (sword) only. Also i don’t know how to apply those movements in fighting. What if one asks me applications of movements? …ok, if one pays me fees, I will have to teach Tai Chi, on my terms and conditions, still I cannot teach fighting.


Today I went to garden early, after warm-up I started practicing Tai Chi at 07:04 am, two other guys asked me to teach them Tai Chi, I politely refused their request. They are there to learn Kungfu, their teacher charges 700/- rupees and they want me to teach them Tai Chi. I made an excuse ‘I don’t have enough patience to teach Tai Chi, though you can join me my practices.’
I find me financially weak to live alone. I’m not earning enough money to survive. Sometimes I think, being Tai Chi teacher can be another option but suddenly I’m filled with guilt – Chi Chi, Melody & Hui taught me Tai Chi without money, why should I charge money from others then?? – And I drop the idea to teach Tai Chi.


Casting coordination is not so good. It’s boring. Artists who are working, are either busy or ask for money. Budget is always low. I cannot do it lifelong. I need work, I can enjoy my freedom with fame and prosperity. I need respect, love, popularity, as well. Well, ..I don’t know future.


09:23 am Thursday 29th December 2016

24th December 2016, Saturday 

​Yesterday I made calls to some Tai Chi teachers. One of them said his fee is 12 thousands for seven months, two days class in a week, and he allows practicing with him forever. I asked him about certification course, he said he doesn’t give certificate but he can certify me. He clearly said on phone that he teaches Qi Kong, and not Tai Chi martial art.
Second was a lady said me to come and meet. Today I went to the address she sent me. I rang the bell, a fatty girl opened the door and asked me my ID card that I gave her. After a minute she returned my ID card and allowed me to enter. It was a 1bhk flat fully decorated colourful, so many posters of Bruce Lee and his quotes were on wall. Some of certificates of instructors were also there among posters. Three boys were inside practicing kicks. That fatty girl asked me to read quotes, newspaper cuttings of instructor praising her, etc. I finished all then she said me to watch a video on tv which was their fighting practices, fees etc. After video finished, fatty girl sent me inside to talk to the instructor. It was a lady dressing in half military costume and half casual. She said about herself that she and other male teacher have been trainers for special forces etc. In our talking a clearly told her that I’m interested in Tai Chi not in fighting. Though, my intentions were to know what and how much knowledge they have about Tai Chi, but I found her dragging me to learn Martial Art. She put the logic that I’m young so need to learn Martial Art instead learning Tai Chi. Her fee was 10 thousands rupees per month, three months course for Tai Chi instructed by instructors, and if she herself would teach then it will be 20 thousands rupees per month. I left them leaving impression that ‘I’m not impressed.’ I didn’t tell them that I know Tai Chi. 
Yes I want to learn more Tai Chi forms. I know 24, 48 & 32 (sword). I’m nowadays willing to learn 56 but Chi Chi and Melody don’t know 56. — Also, I want to teach Tai Chi. I want to teach it as a Moving Meditation and Physical Exercise. I was not taught it as fighting skill. How can I promote/advertise myself, I don’t know. I don’t want to use internet, websites. Tai Chi in slow way (24 & 48) doesn’t attract youths of India. It may attract a little to old age people but they are fashioned by Yoga (only physical exercises of Yoga Philosophy not the Real Yoga). Ramdev is a good businessman who has marketized Yoga and brought it in fashion. 
I don’t have certificate. I learned Tai Chi from Chi Chi, Melody and Hui. I want to payback to society. I’m not to be a Master or Guru. I want to remain a friend for all.
But some questions are there in my mind–

How and where can I find students?

How to find old age people willing to learn Tai Chi?

Would they like to do Tai Chi instead Yoga?

How can I make Tai Chi more attractive for youth?

Do people like to fight only and not peace?
A boy, I’m teaching Tai Chi in garden, doesn’t seem to learn it. His father forces him to learn but the boy is not interested. I feel, Tai Chi doesn’t attract grownups. Ramdev has covered entire India with physical exercises of Yoga Atheist Philosophy with help of BJP Government. I’m not a businessman. Jack Ma is great, salute to him.
Evening was great in Fotang. It was language class today but they had invited a friend, so we had been talking and cleaning lamps, then we all had dinner together and I came home.

Now, Drinking Tea before bed.
22:06 Saturday 24th December 2016

Illusioned Answers 

Yesterday I was thinking for Teaching Tai Chi as my optional source of income, nowadays I have no work in acting. But I didn’t take any course from any institution. My teachers are three girls who themselves are not professional Tai Chi teachers. They are here in India to propagate Tao/Dao. If I’m asked from which institute I’m from or which style I follow in Tai Chi, I have not answer. I even don’t get into much in theories.
I asked this question in “Tai Chi Secrets Movements” on Facebook and I recieved some comments I will share here later but today when I went to Garden, I found a new learner who also teaches Wu Shu professionally. I got the answer in my mind :- 
I can’t make it other source of income until I feel myself enough to teach.

I can’t teach people until they come to me.

I can’t teach Tai Chi until I earn trust of people.

Until people have faith in me, I can’t teach Tai Chi.

I know only 24, 48 & 32

Not matter how much I know, I must be perfect on what I know.
Some best Comments I got in “Tai Chi Secrets Movements” on Facebook are –
1- Lauriat Lane Third

In todays world, in almosy every field certifications are pretty much a joke, and even more so in any of the “esoteric disciplines”. Judge by visible talent and knowledge, and openmly scorn certificate collectors!
2 – Julien Valiquette

Usually your own teacher gives you the permission to teach. No one else. The reason for this is to ensure you teach proper technique according to your teacher’s standards. If taught wrong, the stances can hurt the student’s joints and back.
3 – Aaron Ferguson

In the USA we need a certification just to walk down the street. In the real world of Chinese Martial Arts the answer is… what? Who you learned from, what they taught you, and what you can do with it are everything. Let’s put this way, if you’re certified you’re probably not authentic, but many masters are catering to this Western requirement today. To the best of my knowledge the Chen Village offers no certifications.
4 – Edward Stanulevich IV

Certification is only worth what you put into it. I’ve met and spoken with plenty of highly ranked or certified people who didn’t know their peng from a hole in the ground. The best training I’ve received was from “unauthorized dealers” in backyards and basements. The first person I learned Taijiquan from had a certificate from a master he studied under in the park. As far as I know, neither of them had official rank. Their skill spoke for its self, so they didn’t need it.

A big part of certification and rank is politics. The black belt system originally required service to the art, school, and master to advance past the basic levels.
5 – Keni Lee Burgess

It is best to study with one teacher and progress through the stages of beginner, intermediate, and advanced. If there really is anything known as “secrets”, you will discover them through a consistent practice. It would be foolish to teach physics to a kindergartener. Teachers are usually not interested in butterfly students. Building a solid relationship is the traditional method. Tried and true, it works.
07:01 Wednesday 21st December 2016